The Lightening of the Burden

It had been a chaotic and busy Laandsrat session. Seren had sat in the middle pew in the chamber as the light cut through the air from stained glass windows. The chamber had been a hectic cacophony of life with those unable to take seats standing at the back. It had been an important day - a new Great House had been inaugurated and the Asgard, a somewhat mysterious species, had taken their seat on the Laandsrat. The creature was short and grey with a bulbous head - the most alien....alien she'd seen in some time. She hadn't been happy and expressed it in no uncertain terms although she suspected no-one had heard her. Another outsider on the Laandsrat. She understood the reasons behind it. It allowed the Laandsrat to act unilaterally for the good of various factions within the Concordat and far, far beyond. And while they dealt with matters that spanned the stars, it would increasingly allow the Dawla to become the defacto planetary government. At least it would, if the Laandsrat didn't keep the lower house on a tight leash.

 After that lengthy process, they had moved onto other issues. A missing navigator from the Spacing Guild Corpus. Major Arnold Gustav had arrived to give an update on the investigation. That's quick work, Seren had pondered, the news had broken just a few hours earlier at the Dawla session. Or had news of the disappearance been suppressed allowing the investigation to work unhindered?. Seren had never actually seen a Navigator before although a hefty percentage of her profits were channelled towards them so it came as a surprise when one of their number phased into the chambers in a cloud of spice smoke. The Laandsrat session collapsed into chaos and the Magistrate used her executive powers to eject the audience from the chambers.

Standing outside in the sandy courtyard, Seren stared at the large doors that led to the chambers. The courtyard bustled with people, some sitting, some standing, some talking, some smoking. Seren saw none of them, her focus was entirely on the doors. She knew something important was going on inside that chamber. She was a member of the government. That goddamn grey thing that had barely been on the council half an hour would know something an elected official did not. Unacceptable! She strode towards the doors with a purpose and as she reached the door, pushing it aside, she heard someone say "I wouldn't do that, Ma'am."

She span on her heel, casting her eyes across the crowd. Several people were staring at her and she hadn't recognised the voice. With an air of defiance, she walked away from the doors, raised her voice to make sure everyone could hear and said "And why not? I have every right. I will know what's going on in there by hook or by crook!"

She flounced to the ground, pulling at her dress to ensure a comfortable seat. It was then she noticed the Sister who appeared to be taking an interest.

"Delegate Undercroft", said the Sister, speaking from beneath her habit, "..would you care to retire to the nearby tavern?"

Seren stood gingerly, dusting herself off. She eyed the sister briefly and having allowed herself time to think responded positively. The tavern was busy when they sat and it was difficult to hear above the commotion. After a few minutes, they decided to go to the Colosseum and when they got there, sat on the stone seats  above the arena.

"It is pleasant here", said the Sister, "...when there are no games." She cast her eyes over the arena then turned to Seren apologetically, "Forgive me, I am Sister Rose of the Nicomedian Sisterhood. I don't recall having introduced myself"

Seren had followed her gaze around the arena and eventually met it, smiling "You didn't but it's quite alright."
Sister Rose returned the smile and looking back out towards the arena said "I have read your campaign literature....this must be very frustrating for you, the lack of transparency."
"Yes....yes it is. I still have to push through the acts that will prevent...this from happening." Seren pointed her thumb in the general direction of the council chambers to clarify what she meant. "Just today, I'd prepared the Araxian Freedom of Information Act, but we ran out of time before I could present it to the Dawla."

Seren noticed a soft smile upon the Sister's face but it was tinged with a hint of sadness. "You will need allies. It is a building that you are creating."

The captain pursed her lips and nodded "That's an interesting way to put it." She sighed reflectively. "I don't know who to trust, I came into information that made me question people I work with."

"None of us are quite what we seem", said the Sister sagely, "Even you Delegate...some see a freighter captain but miss the politician." She paused to let the words sink in. "Cicero wrote: 'Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself'...perhaps you only need to trust yourself."

Seren straightened up and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.When she spoke, she couldn't hide her pessimism, a sense of defeat. "Maybe....but the truth is I am just a freighter captain. I'm not the leader of an alliance or the commander of a vast army. I'm just a freighter captain."

"And isn't that your strength? You have no other agenda but your own. No master to serve but the people who elected you. No star to follow but that which burns in your heart."

Seren found she took great comfort from the Sister's words and wondered why she found it so easy to talk to the woman before her. Perhaps it was true that it was easier to talk problems through with strangers than friends. Or maybe it was because someone seemed to be take a genuine interest in her ideas without an ulterior motive. Whatever it was, she felt comfortable in the Sister's presence.

Turning to the sister, she nodded and replied "I know what you're saying is true but sometimes....sometimes it gets too much", and then with a hint of frustration, "I'm not respected, that's clear."

"Is there no-one you feel can trust?"

"My crew...perhaps, but beyond them, here on Araxes....I dare not turn my back for fear of finding a dagger in it."

"Ah", the Sister smiled wisely, "welcome to the world of Araxian politics.....tell me, why did you run for office? I know what your literature says...I mean beyond that."

Seren paused to think, expecting her trader/politician mind to generate a suitable public-relations type response but instead the simple, honest truth came to the surface.

"Someone thought I'd be good at it."

"And you have faith in their judgement?"

"I do, I've known them since I was a child, practically raised me."

"And this faith is solid, it has not changed?"

Seren paused and looked at the Sister, again realising she was taking a great deal of comfort from the conversation. "No", she said, "I don't think anything could change that."

"Then what has changed to shake you so?"

The captain sank back into her chair, looking up into the sky beyond the awnings and feeling the sunlight dance upon her skin. "It's just too hard, I can't do what I promised people I could."

"How will you lighten the burden?"

Seren jabbed a finger at the sky "I could run as far from this planet as I can."

Turning away, Sister Rose asked "Is that what is at the center of your heart?"

In response, the Captain laughed a humourless laugh. "A few years ago...maybe so. I still want to run but I don't think I could look myself in the mirror everyday if I did."

"Then you have your answer", the Sister spoke with clarity, tenderness and directness, "You must stay and fight."

They sat for a few moments, letting the words settle. After a while, Sister Rose stood and asked "Shall we return to the chambers, Delegate Undercroft?"

Seren looked up at the sister and smiled, saying thank you without words. She stood and they walked back to the chambers.